I feel as if I'm becoming myself again. For the past two years plus I have felt who I am slip away. I have watched my abilities dwindle. I lost the ability to do many things I love or enjoy doing. Cooking, baking, bread making, cross-stitching, cleaning, picking up my children, ect were all impossible tasks or made to be very painful and difficult. I knew having a wrist fusion would forever change my life, but everyone in the EDS community said it would be something positive and that I wouldn't regret it. They were absolutely correct.
I may have a large, noticeable scar. I may have lost the ability to bend my wrists, permanently. But I have gained so much back. Today I was able to open a pill bottle, with my hands. Pill bottles are the bane of my existence, especially as I know take quite a few pills a day. I normally am stuck unless Chris is home, or I've placed my pills in an easy open bottle. Today I filled my diluadid prescription and was able to open it myself!
Every day now I am able to do dishes, fold laundry, scrub down the kitchen. I can vacuum a room at a time. I can pick up my son without issue. I'm beginning to cook again, and hope to be back to baking soon. The only pain I have now is in my elbow and one of my ankles. But my head isn't consumed by it anymore. I used to feel so useless when I couldn't do anything, and now I'm starting to feel like myself again.
If there are any EDSers reading this, who struggle with whether or not a fusion is the right choice - in my experience it really really is. You may lose some ability, but you gain back so much more.
"melody," a poem
2 weeks ago